She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
