My liver just broke up with me...
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
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