His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
