it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
