Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
