Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
