It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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