id be glad to
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
