maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
