apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
