We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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