We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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