Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize
