I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
