Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
