It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize