Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
