Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
