I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
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