3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
