Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize