It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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