i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
He better not be in your backpack
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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