I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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