Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
this will be a night to untag.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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