Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
i now understand why vodka
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
