I'm drive I can fine osifer
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
