My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
