Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
they're like a gay fantastic four
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
