I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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