We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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