Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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