Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
