Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
