so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Little spoons don't ask big questions
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
