David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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