mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
