oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize
