So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
only you would photoshop your dick
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Randomize
