i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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