Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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