it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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