Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
