he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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