apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
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