I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
