So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
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