i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
