Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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