So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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